Paranoia is not a neurosis

See now, this is what I don't understand.

Why would you think I had neuroses?

Seriously, you think I'm neurotic?

Shit, what did I say?
Did I say something?
It was something I wrote, wasn't it?

I don't think I have any neuroses.

I don't, actually.
I'm really not neurotic.
I think it's odd you would imagine I was.
Are you sure you aren't projecting?

Maybe you're reading too much into it.
When did I suggest I might be neurotic?
Are you sure you didn't get mixed up with someone else?

I'm not neurotic.
Maybe I've been too empathetic towards your neuroses
You've got that confused with my neuroses
Which I don't have
You've conflated tolerance with neuroses
But even so,
Why would you think I'm neurotic?

Go on, why?
No, really, why?
Just tell me
You can
I won't get neurotic about it
Hah! The very idea!
Me, neurotic?

(Now you think I can't write poems
You do, don't you?
But I can.
If I had any neuroses (which I don't), I'd write a lovely poem about them
With metre and everything
I could if I wanted to
Why would you imagine I couldn't?
Are you picking on me because I'm a neurosis-free zone? You are, aren't you? Bitch!)


Ani Smith said...

Uh-oh. Somebody's got eeeeeeshoooz!

Z said...

I do not have issues! YOU'VE got issues! And what's more, you LIKE having issues :)

Seriously, as soon as the topic of neuroses came up, I couldn't think of any. Not even when I walked up the left hand staircase by mistake and then had to go back down and walk up the right hand one BECAUSE THAT'S THE ONE I ALWAYS WALK UP AND THE WORLD WILL END IF I DON'T WALK UP THE PROPER WAY. But I think that's just perfectly normal OCD and not a proper neurosis. It is, isn't it?

jem said...

Painfully true :)